State St. Shitshow

30 10 2007

It’s true. We went to the famous riot-prone, drunk infested State St. this past weekend for all sorts of fun halloween crazy.  Granted, they’ve cleaned it up a bit, charge admission, and added a million more cops, but it was my first time.


No riots, no tear gas, but it did not disappoint. 120 arrests that night. Luckily I wasn’t one of them.  I was too busy trying not to trip over myself.  I failed. But that story will follow… have to start at the v. beginning…State Street

M & I drove down late on Saturday and the drinking had already started by the time we arrived at 5pm.  By 9pm, we were heavily intoxicated, dressed in costumes, and picture posing as we awaited our cab.  Amongst the group we had:  Hans&Frans (from snl), Joanna (office space), a one-night stand, Ginger Spice, and a washed up rockstar.

My night began and ended with a hobo.  I nearly tripped over the first as we ran across the Capitol’s lawn.  We made it into 3 different bars (or so the camera documented) and saw tons of different people.  I was exceeding excited about ‘finding’ Waldo, meeting Hunter S. Thompson, seeing Abe Lincoln (no clue why. I always found him to be a bit intimidating looking.), and talking to a woman from Belfast who, bless her heart, didnt kill me despite all my pestering. 

Sometime before the last bar I broke the 3inch heel off one of my boots.  While it suited my drugaddict, drunkassed look, it made walking all the more challenging.  I managed alright til we left the partying and I tripped going up the handicapped ramp.  Face Plant. No, seriously. I landed right on my face. My hands didn’t feel the need to attempt a catch. I’m bruised & battered.  Skinned knees, scraped up face (by all means i shouldve at least broken my nose!), random bruises… Somehow we all survived the night despite my heel, M freezing, taking a public piss just outside the Capitol, M’s disappearing cellphone, and me bumming a light off another hobo.

Personal Victory:  I didnt not make out with anyone!!! WOOO! Go Me! I’d like to say I didn’t drunkdial either but apparently I did.  My cousin found me passed out in his bed with my cell to my ear.  Got a call in the morning from one of the 3 guys I called (2x each!).  Unless they bring it up though… I gonna pretend it never happened.  I do wonder what I said in the messages I left them… oh well!




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