Persuasion

*Note* I know I’ve been a shit commentator as of late.  I’m still reading all you lovelies.  Just feeling awfully self-involved at the moment and can’t seemed to think nice thoughts.  I have 230 posts left to catch up on, but I promise I’ll get to it soon.  Feel free to leave a nasty comment. I deserve it.

So obviously “that time of the month.”  Last week all I could think about was sex.  This week I’m feeling miserably alone.  Tempted by chocolate.  (not that it helps.) Threating to cry. (for what reason?) Checking my inbox every hour for msgs from Indie. (none.) Pathetic.

***

SCE called over Easter totally out of the blue.  We were both back home for the weekend, and he was looking to go out to the bars.  I had friends over and turned him down.  Still.  Flattered he called. First time I’ve heard from him since the game.

***

One of the most beautiful things I’ve ever read:

I can listen no longer in silence.  I must speak to you by such means as are within my reach.  You pierce my soul.  I am half agony, half hope.  Tell me not that I am too late, that such precious feelings are gone for ever.  I offer myself to you again with a heart ever more your own than when you almost broke it, eight and a half years ago.  Dare not say that man forgets sooner than woman, that his love has an earlier death.  I have loved none but you.  Unjust I may have been, weak and resentful I have been, but never inconstant.  - From a letter to Anne Elliot by Captain Wentworth in Jane Austen’s Persuasion

Austen wrote with such delibrate passion that slowly develops until it bursts forth in that letter.  I borrowed both Persuasion & Northanger Abbey from the library last week.  I’m desperate to go back for more.

*** 

My sister is staying with me til Saturday.  I’d call her little, but she is 17 & 5′6.”  Love her to death.  She’s f*ing hilarious, gorgeous, a totally healthnut and understands me like no one else.  Then the parentals are picking us up on their way through town and we’re off to Michigan Ave & Ikea SHOPPING. 

*** 

It’s lunchtime. I’ve been reading through a book a friend gave me for my birthday.  A Woman’s Europe is a collection of short stories written by women - so far we’ve only hit Greece, France and Italy a few times.  Surprisingly, moved first by the quote on a title page and the author descriptions following each passage.

“It is never too late to be what you might have been.”  - George Eliot (aka Mary Ann Evans)

And how would my description read?

“Grace Kelly is a brillant & engaging marketing assistant currently working in the construction industry doing non-marketing tasks.  She resides in the city with her cousin and a plant she can’t kill.  After graduating college last May, she has not managed to learn to cook or keep house and still hates laundry.  She is single & petless.  Someday she hopes to meet Mr. Right, get married and have 4 lovely children.  In the meantime, she excels at her dull job and dreams wistfully of a Mr. Indie who she still somewhat hopes will come around in full Captain Wentworth style.”

Vegas

The Vegas in T-18 Days.
I can’t wait!  I’m meeting up with all the girls from my time spent in London.  It is so difficult to believe that I haven’t seen at least half of them in 2 full years.  Wow. 

On this day 2 years ago…. I would’ve been working in Twickenham, commuting back to S.Ken, stopping at Sainsburys for a bottle of store brand vodka and some Diet Coke, throwing on a short skirt & heels and taking pulls from the delicious mix on the tube with the girl friends.  Then stumbling into the nearest ONeills or Walkabout and dancing my ass off.

Look out Vegas!  Here we come!  With 3 nights, 3 days planned… we’re gonna be spending lots of mornings in recovery and nights on the town.  I can’t even recount half the ridiculousness that is our group.  There was….

• The morning I laid out at the local A&E (not shopping like my roommate thought - it’s Accident & Emergency) to get a doctor to cut a shard of glass out of my foot.  Drunken me walked home barefoot the night previous.  Brillant
• The MakeoutMap
• Getting left at the bars by your swasted friends
• The AZ girlies sneaking some guys home with us - past the horribly observant mid-eastern front desk people.  When they got kicked outa their room, they all slept on the floor of ours.
• Making my roommate get off the bus… and walk three miles to our place - because I had decided we were most definitely past our bus stop
• Being mistaken for a hooker in my short skirt & trench  - by the cops
• Going home with a friend and a random in Putney - and playing his version of PS2 & MarioKart til all hours while drinking his wine and refusing his advances
• Tripping out the door of O’Neills …over & over & over
• Walk of Shame - not mine, but witnessing it…
• And finally, the mornings of “how did I get home?” over Starbucks and laughing at the pictures we captured the night before

Anyways, Vegas is gonna rock!

Ps - Psyched for the NewYorkNewYork ROLLERCOASTER!

I know you’ve seen these…

I loved that movie meme.  Unfortunately no one is getting them. boo.

well, the quotes are a little difficult now that I’ve looked at them again.  If we’re facebook friends - they are all listed in my profile.  They aren’t really obscure films.  I’m sure you’ve heard of most of them, if not all.  1 thing to note - only #14 is set in the US. (well, 2,10,14,&15)  I’ve considered giving easy hints but that’d be no fun. ah well, we’ll see if you need them.

So here are a few hints:

1. 1997 - Foreign film, Italian, 3 Oscars, Drama, Wartime, Romance
2. - boondock saints
3. 2004 - Foreign film, 1 Oscar, Drama, Adventure, Dramatization of real life story
4. 2005 - Disutopia
5. 2005 - Foreign setting, Colorful, Based on novel
6. 1957 - Popular love story
7. 1987 - Drama, Action, Nominated for 6 Oscars, Wartime, Lead character is a young boy
8. 2005 - Drama, Action, Same lead character as in #5, Culture of sport
9. 2006 - Drama, Action, 1 Oscar
10. - breakfast club
11. 2007 - Same lead character as one in #9, Biography, Drama, Romance
12. 1942 - Popular love story, Black&White, Drama, Romance, Wartime, 3 Oscars
13. 2001 - Foreign film, French, Nominated for 5 Oscars (allie & cl, if you don’t get this one I’m so stealing your copy!)
14. 2006 - Comedy, Drama, Based on novel, somewhat ‘royal tenenbaums’ obscure
15. - ferris bueller’s day off

And here are the quotes.

Career Future?

Most days I hate my job. No, hate is a strong word. I dislike my job; I hate my boss.  However, the company I work for is phenomenal.

•  
  • Family owned – that’s what I grew up with.
  • Large with medium sized branch offices
  • Quarterly mtgs – all the ee’s attend and hear the confidential stuff most Co’s don’t tell you 
  • Profit sharing - semiannual incentive checks

So I just got my big ol fatty incentive check! That’s a new purse, new dress, & all of Vegas! Fuck yes! Plus I got a raise within 6months of starting here.

All in all, great company. Seriously. But I hate where I am in it. Other than the fact that it is boring as hell, there is nowhere to move here unless I transfer to another branch. I am the marketing dept of this branch. I know I could always see about a transfer into the HQ, but that’s back near the homecity. Am I really ready to go back there yet? No. I just got here.

*sigh*

And the real question: Do I ever want to go back home and work at the family company? It’s my dad’s dream to have at least one of his kids continue the tradition, and we always figured it’d be me. I could bring in a lot of the things I see here that really makes the employees work hard bc the companies are very similar in structure & culture – just not industry. It’s an amazing company and doing wonderfully at adapting to a constantly changing demand. But could I really work with all that family?

Sometimes I just feel like my whole life is in preparation for going home and working there. Haven’t yet decided if that’s a bad thing.

Ps - Don’t forget the movie meme!  We still only 3 for 15!

Hangovers & Meeting the neighbors

(I was supposed to publish this on the 18th but forgot.)

What crackhead put Easter so close to St. Paddy’s Day? A bit hungover this morning. Rocked the dance floor last night at the local pub! Granted my ‘competition’ was all drunker than I, but I definitely put those 3 years of Irish Step dancing classes to some use finally! One treble jig later *And the crowd goes wild!* Fuck yes!

Last night looked to be aiming for a night in. I was exhausted and ready to start a new Jane Austen book. Roomie was looking for a bit more and pulled out the beer. We heard a door open in the hall, and she ran for it – loudly.
“Grace! It’s them!”
(whispering) “shh. Yes. But I thought I saw them the other day outside the building. They aren’t very cute. Boo.”
“What?! No way, I think you must’ve seen someone else. Look! One is even really buff!”
(mouthing) “They can hear you!”
“Oh now he’s looking this way!” (long pause) “Huh. He’s still looking at our door.”
(in sign language) “They can hear you!”
“What?! Oh god!”

We watched via the peephole as the two guys went into their apartment. The door shuts. We each crack open a second beer. Yea we’re stalkers. Whatev

One of the best/worst things about life with roomie is our thought patterns. She is “let’s go!” Whereas I like to first visualize a situation from every possible positive/negative angle calculating risk. Her way won out as I determined that at least we’ll prolly never see them if it is all awkward since no on in the bldg interacts. So we hopped over and introduced ourselves.

They’re good looking, our age, funny, nice, and totally welcoming. They showed us their apt, we showed them ours. Chatted for almost an hour and met some of their friends. They told us they just moved up here last wk, played rugby together, and are not used to a non-dorm setting. They have cable and love to cook so we’ve been invited over “whenever your small, noncable tv just doesn’t cut it.” We’re talking about doing a dinner together soon! sweet.

Then we went out the Pub to meet up with friends. There was live music and dancing upstairs. Basically it was mostly just a bunch of drunks swinging each other around and jigging in a tap/polish/irish/russian-equse way. When the circle opened up I did a treble jig (or rather as much of it as I remembered). It was great! Several random people said I “stole the show.” Such a confidence boost!

Roomie remembers bits of the ‘jump-2-3′ that we taught her ages ago but that’s it. It was awesome to feel like I kinda had the higher ground for once. I know that sounds bad but hearing that another friend-of-friend (‘the comedian’ or TC) digs her kinda made me sad. I’m not even interested in him, but to have another one go to her? Anyway. Enough being depressing.

I told her what our friend said about wanting to set me up with TC - but TC wanting to be setup with roomie. It took her by surprise, but I realized that I don’t need to keep those things in. I need to find balance by being open and okay with things. Learning to remain in state of happiness. Ended up joint calling TC and we chatted with him for a while which was awesome - really reaching out past that friends-of-friends barrier. (my idea) Unfortunately, he’s in NY but we’re making plans to hangout when he gets back.

Pushing my limits a bit? I think so! Fuck yes!

IT’S MY BIRTHDAY!!! 

Hell Yes!  22 Years!

I’m celebrating by working out of headquarters today because I have a training session this afternoon.  In some ways it’s kinda great because I got to go home & see my family & my dogs.  Went out last night with a college friend who was still in town while everyone else is off on spring break - we had a fantastic mom-cooked dinner, went to the cinema for Horton Hears a Who (cute!) and then ice creamed it up til 1am chatting. Good Time.  Good Times.

 The training session today is “Email Etiquette”

Yea. I’m learning how to write an email.  Huh. You’d think I would’ve picked up on that sometime during my college years.  If I haven’t… oh fuck off. Really? A class on writing emails?  I will have to update you on this. Maybe it’s really more complicated than I thought.  Probably not.  Eh.  Good waste of a day.

Who Cares!? It’s my BIRTHDAY!!!

Movie Meme

Jen posted this meme and I just had to try it! When you’re done, check out hers and see what you can remember.

Here are the rules:

• Pick 15 of your favorite movies:
• Go to IMDb and find a quote for each of the movies
• Post them here for everyone to guess
• Strikeout when someone correctly guesses in the comments, put who guessed it and the movie
• No Googling or using IMDb

1.

“What kind of place is this? It’s beautiful: Pigeons fly, women fall from the sky! I’m moving here!” Renee - La Vita e’ Bella (Life is Beautiful)

2.

“What the fuck were you going to do, laugh the last three to death, Funny-Man?” Renee - Boondock Saints

3.

“You gotta fight for every breath and tell death to go to hell.”

4.

“Who? Who is but the form following the function of what, and what I am is a man in a mask.” Smiley - V for Vendetta

5.

“This is Sammy Davis Jr. Jr… She is Grandfather’s Seeing Eye bitch. Father purchased her for him not because he believes Grandfather is blind, but because a Seeing Eye bitch is also a good thing for people who pine for the opposite of loneliness. In truth, Father did not purchase her at all, but merely retrieved her from the home for forgetful dogs. Because of this, she is not a real Seeing Eye bitch, and is also mentally deranged.”

6.

“Oh, it’s nobody’s fault but my own! I was looking up… it was the nearest thing to heaven! You were there…”

7.

“Learned a new word today. Atom bomb. It was like God taking a photograph.”

8.

“And as for this, the violence? I gotta be honest - it grew on me. Once you’ve taken a few punches and realize you’re not made of glass, you don’t feel alive unless you’re pushing yourself as far as you can go.”

9.

“I’m fucking doomed! You know he’s got go-go dancers after me?”

10.

“What was that ruckus?“
“Uh, what ruckus?“
“I was just in my office and I heard a ruckus.”
“Could you describe the ruckus, sir?”  Renee - Breakfast Club

11.

“If you wish to practice the art of fiction, to be considered the equal of a masculine author, then your horizons must be… widened.” Smiley - Becoming Jane

12.

“I remember every detail. The Germans wore gray, you wore blue.” Smiley - Casablanca

13.

“[she] can only see two explanations. 1 - he didn’t get the photo. 2 - before he could assemble it, a gang of bank robbers took him hostage. The cops gave chase. They got away… but he caused a crash. When he came to, he’d lost his memory. An ex-con picked him up, mistook him for a fugitive, and shipped him to Istanbul. There he met some Afghan raiders who too him to steal some Russian warheads. But their truck hit a mine in Tajikistan. He survived, took to the hills, and became a Mujaheddin. [She] refuses to get upset for a guy who’ll eat borscht all his life in a hat like a tea cozy.”

14.

“Well, the only loophole or way I could see me getting you out of school for any considerable length of time would be for you… to commit suicide.” Um…Yum! - Running with Scissors

15.

“Um, he’s sick. My best friend’s sister’s boyfriend’s brother’s girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who’s going with the girl who saw Ferris pass out at 31 Flavors last night. I guess it’s pretty serious.” so@24 - Ferris Bueller’s Day Off

Bonne Chance!

St. Paddy’s & Ramblings

It’s St. Patrick’s Day, and I’m stuck at work.  Would much rather be at home admiring the beautiful decorations I surprised roomie with this morning.  And drinking a pint.  Instead, I’ve my earl grey tea, a computer, & a shitton of work to finish before wednesday.  Love my slacking? Me too.  So I’m just gonna make notations of my random thoughts all day… Ready?  Set?  Drink! …shit, I mean Go!

 

***

Think I nearly cracked a rib reading one of the last Stuff White People Like.  Just about everything in there is cute and I can totally relate (unfortunately/fortunately?) almost every time. 

When white people aren’t working, they generally like to wear Outdoor Performance Clothes. The top suppliers of these garments and accessories include North Face…  The main reason white people like these clothes is that it allows them to believe that at any moment they could find themselves with a Thule rack on top of their car headed to a national park. It could be 4:00 p.m. on a Saturday when they might  get a call “hey man, you know what we need to do? Kayak then camping, right now. I’m on my way to get you, there is no time to change clothes.”  via Outdoor Performance Clothes

 ***

Skimming through the sites again I came across this Xanga - Pikerfromthesticks.  Gah. Remember xanga?  I had one, what, 4 years ago now?  I haven’t a clue what it was called anymore.  Xanga was fantastic if only for the fact that you could easily put up whatever the latest music or novel you’re in the middle of.  Just another random insight - before the Face and all. I’d like to think I wrote beautifully but it’s prolly no different than this blog.  However, the writing of this blog is sublime.  The background is a bit distracting, you’ve gotta highlight the text to actually read, and he hasn’t written in months.  But his descriptions are beautiful.  The words and phrasings he uses are both eloquent and real.  I just have to share:

Oh Ed…Anything But Blue…

Summer’s come and gone and fall is finally here.

2007. I couldn’t have dreamed this one in a thousand years. What a strange year. You gave me so much and very little will ever be the same. If I would have predicted summer in April, I wouldn’t have guessed this. I would be dead fucking wrong.

But lately, that’s just fine by me.

I got a place with two friends on the third floor where the skyline appears bright and luminous. Cranes outside blink their anti-aircraft lights in flashes of red all night, nearly indistinguishable from the pinkish hue that casts itself in perfectly striped lines on my bedroom walls. I work in a restaurant down the street where for the first time in my life, I am the minority and that’s just fine by me.

My life exists in a twelve block radius. I own no car or bike, but leg it through the neighborhood at the pace of life, able to take it all in. The leaves have changed and swirl around me on the street which never fails to get a smile. It makes me want to carve pumpkins.

So I started collecting records and reading in so much free time as the TV collected dust. I bought plants and posters and drank whiskey and wine until I had my fill. I kept my pack small and strong, with always enough time for everybody. I hung out in smoky jazz bars with red and blue lights, far, far away from the scene. There was a beat to my days, with the tempo turned up a bit as of late. Give me a walking bass line and snare, something I can turn the lights down low for, pull my hat over my eyes and just groove to.Then the school year started and things got busy, but part of me thought that was okay. Streamlining to a lean existence can be so satisfying sometimes.I want to take up a language. I want to play piano. I want to tend plants. I want to cook elaborate meals from scratch. I want to help whomever I can. I want to fold a thousand paper cranes, just to set them ablaze for the hell of it. I want to walk that highway 300 miles back to the north country. I want to read until I fall asleep.

The warm fuzzy feeling I get now and again is that there’s time to do these things.

So I might as well hop to it.

See you space cowboy.

Archives note England, Scotland, Norway, Belgium… Definately worth a look.  I especially love the posts from London because he so perfectly illustrates the feeling of life there.

***

Just joined the 20 Somethings Blogger group on last.fm!  Go us! Talk about a wonderful group for a beautiful group of writers.  Props to Deutlich for leading the charge and apparently James for the grand idea.  I did hesitate to throw myself in the ring at first.  I’m ever more aware that I am really putting myself out there on the net now.  The associations between my blog and my music page and the Face… Starts to niggle the worries that the wrong people might stumble across the blog.  But I don’t really see that happening I guess.  Those who I wouldn’t want looking at my writtings wouldn’t think to look anyway.

***

On one last note, I’m in love with the offset of the guitars and the vocals on Galaxies by Laura Veirs.  Listen to it here:  Galaxies 

That’s all. Have a great St. Paddy’s Day! I’ll toast you all with a Guinness tonight.  Party hard! (And don’t you dare drive home drunk tonight.)

strange things abt me:

Ok nobody tagged me, but I’m bored.

• I dream every night, and I remember almost every dream.

• I bite my bottom lip when I’m nervous. My first boyfriend pointed it out our first ‘date’ alone. I usually don’t notice now unless I break the skin. I bite my fingers too when I’m brainstorming.

• I spent one summer biking 24 miles a day. From home to summer classes (9) from class to work (3) and home again along the same route (12). I didn’t half to take the extra class in the summer. I wasn’t paid for the internship. I didn’t get a tan. However, I did get hit by a soccer mom in a minivan and flew into the middle of a busy street. She got out, pointed out my sick bike, and drove away.

• I have a fidget problem. Clicking, tapping, drumming, biting, cracking…

• When I daydream about my future husband, I name him Jack. I just like the name. If I don’t marry a Jack, I’ll name my son that. If I prove unable to have children for some godforsaken reason, I’ll name my golden Jack.

• I hate sitting in chairs. When my boss isn’t around, I sit on my desk with my laptop in my lap. I don’t know why I have to, I just think better there. This is also true for counters, tables & railings.

• I am just not attracted to guys with their hair buzzed off. Grow some and maybe. I also don’t like blondes, anyone taller than 6’1”, or guys who aren’t completely obsessed with music.

boys next door

NEW NEIGHBORS!!! Hells Yes!!! 

I noticed when coming home from work yesterday that loud noises at my end of the hall weren’t roomie blaring music.  In fact, they were the sounds of an apparently huge sound system across the hall blasting some extreme action movie. 

Putting 2 and 2 together (cause I’m smart like that), I’ve determined that the apt that mirrors ours is finally full! AND it’s got at least 2guys living in it.  Now before you get all “stalker!” on my ass, roomie and I determined this based on the loud voices, 2 bedrooms, and lack of 2day move-ins that most girls in the building do.

Which only means… Come St. Patrick’s Day we’ll be stopping next door with a plate of shamrock cookies (ok maybe guinness bc I hate cooking) to welcome them to the building.  Afterall, we need to apologize in advance for being loud neighbors (but hella fun!) and invite them out to the bars! Oh I love this idea.  They sound fun.  I wonder if they’re cute too.